Does it Get Any Douchier?

From Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback, presented without further comment:

All you Westins out there that charge for things like health club use and don't
value your frequent-stayers? Check out the Marriott Denver City Center.

The health club is free, with 24-hour-a-day cardio equipment and gym along with pool usage 18 hours a day. Free water, free cold towels in a mini-fridge for post-workout comfort, mini-TVs on all the cardio equipment. Not enough elliptical trainers, but that's a fight we travelers will never win, even in places where you pay to use the gym.

My summers at Courtyards and Fairfield Inns in the training-camp towns of America have built me up to some big status at Marriotts, so I have the good fortune to get the breakfast deal at the room on the high floor, with CNN on the TV and a nice buffet laid out, gratis. Special K and Granola mixed, with lowfat milk, topped by a banana, with fresh-brewed Starbucks House Blend and one of the very few times I'll check out the Wall Street Journal. Why? Because it's there.

I think it is more than a little obvious that this guy is not frequenting too many health clubs and he sure as shit does not fill up on Special K and Granola in the morning. What. A. Fraud.

Peter King

I'm no fan of Peter King's. In fact, I can't really recall a time when I read his MMQB column and didn't get worked up in a fit of rage. He's a shameless self-promoter and his stories about life as a coffee drinker or his daughter's cell phone bill really irritate the shit out of me. Nevertheless, I read him week in and week out because he does have access to more information than any of the jerk-offs over at Pro Football Talk.

I just finished this week's column where he recaps the happenings from the combine out in Indianapolis. He delivers this little nugget in his quotes section -

"I've got this old saying: A spade is a spade. I'm definitely a spade.''

--Central Florida running back Kevin Smith, in the middle of a group session with reporters Saturday.

I didn't know what he meant, so I asked him to clarify. "If you have game, you have game," he said. "I'm not one to try to hide it. I'm not trying to boost any attributes of myself. I play the game of football. Everyone who watches me, you either like it or you don't. I play running back and I'm very good at playing running back."

Oh. Now I get it.

I actually found that mildly amusing. Peter King managed to be hip for 2.3 seconds.