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Showing posts with label Dogs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dogs. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Vick Wants A Dog... Wait, What?


Michael Vick said he wants to get a dog. The Eagles quarterback, who spent 18 months in prison for his role in allowing the fighting and abuse of dogs on his compound, said in an interview with NBC News on Tuesday that having a pet would show that his transformation is complete. "I would love to get another dog in the future," he said. "I think it would be a big step for me in the rehabilitation process.

"I think just to have a pet in my household and to show people that I genuinely care, and my love and my passion for animals; I think it would be outstanding. If I ever have the opportunity again I will never take it for granted. I miss having a dog right now. I wish I could. My daughters miss having one, and that’s the hardest thing: telling them that we can’t have one because of my actions (WEEI)."

In a way he is saying the right things, but if I was him I wouldn't ever say the work "dog" again, and I certainly wouldn't buy a dog. My favorite part is "I miss having a dog right now", because all I can think is Vick having a bad day, and is like "Damn, I need to relieve some stress, I wish I could just drown a dog today, that would do it".

Just stay away from dogs Vick, we all like you better when you do.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Why Not?

Why not listen to this song about how every group has a Steve?

Friday, July 30, 2010

Why Not?

Why not watch a dog dance to techno?

I mean that is cool and all, but is there something wrong with that dog, or is it just the happiest dog of all time?

Not good enough? Ok, why not watch this awesome Ugandan action flick?

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Why Not?

Why not watch the smartest beagle I've ever seen?

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Why Not?

Why not have your dog do funny/awful things?

Friday, December 4, 2009

Meet The 007 Of Coyotes

"When a brother and sister struck a coyote at 75mph they assumed they had killed the animal and drove on. They didn't realise this was the toughest creature ever to survive a hit-and-run. Eight hours, two fuel stops, and 600 miles later they found the wild animal embedded in their front fender - and very much alive.

And - as if to prove the point - the wily coyote later escaped from where it was being kept to recover. Daniel and Tevyn East were driving at night along Interstate 80 near the Nevada-Utah border when they noticed a pack of coyotes near the roadside on October 12. When one of the animals ran in front of the car, the impact sounded fatal so the siblings thought there no point in stopping.

'Right off the bat, we knew it was bad,' Daniel explained. 'We thought the story was over.'

After the incident around 1am, they continued their 600 mile drive to North San Juan - even stopping for fuel at least twice. But it was only when they finally reached their destination at 9am did they take time to examine what damage they may have sustained. At first it looked as though it was going to be quite gruesome.

'[Daniel] saw fur and the body inside the grill,' Tevyn East said. 'I was trying to keep some distance. Our assumption was it was part of the coyote - it didn't register it was the whole animal.'

Daniel East got a broom to try and pry the remains out of the bumper and got the shock of his life.

'It flinched,' Tevyn East said. 'It was a huge surprise - he got a little freaked out.'

The pair immediately phone Wildlife Rehabilitation and Release.

'We could see a little bit of blood, not a lot, and we couldn't see any wounds,' Tevyn East said. 'We didn't know if it was suffering and we should put it out of its misery, or if we could rescue it. But we realized we were going to have to take the front end of the car off to get to it.'

The coyote had been thoroughly embedded between the front fender and radiator of their Honda Fit car - and had amazingly survived the journey without any broken bones or internal injuries.

'It just had some scrapes on its paw,' Daniel East said.

The coyote - which was nicknamed Tricky - became active while trying to escape the car space so, fearing severe internal injuries, wildlife rescue worker Jan Crowell managed to snare a loop around its neck. Jan took the coyote to a kennel in her yard while figuring out where to release it. But three days later the coyote saw its chance - and escaped by wriggling beneath the bottom bar of the cage (Dailymail).'

This is the coolest story I have heard in a long time. How the hell did it survived getting hit by that car? Then stuck under there for 600 miles, and when it is finally released it is put in a cage, where it escapes back into the wild. This is the most James Bond Coyote I have ever heard of.....BADASS.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Monday, July 27, 2009

Shooting A Pregnant Woman Joke


(Calm down it's not as bad as you think)

There was once a woman who was pregnant with triplets. As she walked through a park, a mugger came out, shot her three times in the stomach, nicks her things and runs away. She is taken to hospital, and is told that all three babies are unhurt. However the doctor couldn’t remove the three bullets, without severely harming the babies.

16 years later, her three children are upstairs. One of the girls runs down crying her eyes out, saying ´´Mum, I’ve just been for a wee, and a bullet fell out´´ So the mum calms her down, and tells them what happened 16 years ago.

A week later, another one of the girls runs up to the mum, crying, saying ´´Mum, I’ve just been for a wee, and a bullet fell out´´ So, the mum calmed her down, and again told the story of what happened 16 years ago.

Another week later, the son runs up to the mum, crying his eyes out. Saying.. ´´MUM!´..´´ but before he could finish, the mum says ´´Yes, I know, you went for a wee and a bullet came out.´´ He replies, ´´No, I was playing with myself, and I shot the dog.´´

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Taco Bell Dog Is Dead


"The famous Taco Bell Spokesdog – who charmed audiences with the catchphrase “Yo Quiero Taco Bell” – has died. Gidget, the 15-year-old Chihuaha, suffered a fatal stroke Tuesday night, according to a report from People magazine (FoxNews)."

End of an era....

But to be honest probably one of the more racist dogs I knew. Just saying I heard he was a bigot. Really, it hated Mexicans and had a whole self loathing thing going on with his dubbed over voice. Used to bite everyone....actually good thing it died.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Screwed the Pooch


Michelle Owen of Indiana was worried that her boyfriend had used her computer to search for child porn [note to FBI word search computer: these are not the droids you're looking for]. So like any responsible citizen dating a suspected child molester, she took it in for the police to examine.

…but her plan backfired when cops discovered two videos of her engaged in illicit acts with a dog [sad trombone sound]. Owen, 24, was charged last week with two felony bestiality counts in connection with the video files, which a detective found in the laptop’s “recycle bin.” At the time Owen asked cops to search the computer, she was locked up in the Johnson County Jail on a public intoxication charge (which violated the terms of her release in a prior drunk driving case). According to a police affidavit, a copy of which you’ll find here, a cop told Owen that he had found videos of her on the laptop and asked if she “knew what those files might be.” Owen replied, “The one with the dog.” Cops believe that the dog in question, Toby, is a beagle. After asking if she was “going to be charged with this,” Owen said that the videos “were just something she did when she was drunk and barely remembers it.” [thesmokinggun]

I really don't want to ask this question, but how does a woman fuck a dog? Fucking a dog would mean that dog was a willing participant right? Unless she was like fucking the dog with like a toy....OK, I am done, I have grossed myself out...

(in case you were wondering it was a beagle)