Remember hometown hero Doug "Grandslam" Mirabelli? Yeah, he's doing well. Living large up in Traverse City, Minnesota. I'm sure it is a very lovely place, where ever the the fuck it is.
Sure, baseball is over but after an 11 year career he must have built up some serious financial security allowing him to lounge about with the wife and kids all day. Right? He played in over 500 games, had more than 1400 at bats and hit 58 home runs. Hell, he was rushed via police escort from Logan to Fenway just to save the Sox against their division rivals. This guy was invaluable.
Over the course of his career he pulled down more than $7 million. He had no damanging late career divorce to dilute 50% of his earnings, unlike his catching counterpart. Surely, Dougie wouldn't need to take full time work after baseball to maintain his standard of living. Well, that is when it hits you. The $7 mil was pre-tax and the tax man can be quite a burden to the wealthy. Perhaps some spot broadcasting assignments on NESN, maybe the occasional autograph show and some paid corporate appearances will supplement the $3.5 mil post tax windfall and allow Doug to keep on living the dream.
Then again, maybe not. Mirabelli is now gainfully employed by Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors as a full-time sales associate. He currently has two properties listed (not bad for a down market!) and lists his interests as family, fishing, hunting and fantasy football.
New boss has this to say about his prize associate:
"We're happy to have Doug Mirabelli join our company," said Ken Schmidt, CEO of Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors. "He obviously has a drive to succeed and a willingness to work hard to achieve his goals." Schmidt first contacted Mirabelli after he retired from baseball, having noted the success that other professional athletes had achieved working with other Coldwell Banker Brokers around the country.
Let this be a lesson to all you unretired journeyman hacks. Dig a hole in your backyard and start burying it. Or you'll be hocking houses in Shit Town, Wisconsin 6 months into retirement.
