Bench Clearing... Chit Chats

Yesterday evening, I'm watching Baseball Tonight, and highlights of the Cardinals/Astros game comes on. I guess these two teams have a recent history of beanballs and hard slides. Brandon Backe throws up and in to Yadier Molina. Although the pitch didn't hit Molina, he does the token slow walk toward the mound. Slow enough so by the time he gets anywhere, the catcher, the umpires, the infielders, both benches, and both bullpens will be involved.



I got real cheesed when I saw this. First of all, hitters have become over reactive little girls when it comes to getting hit, or even brushed back by pitches. Grow up and take it like a fucking man, not some millionaire crybaby.

Second of all, if you're gonna make a move toward the mound, go all out. Start running for the pitcher, hope to get there a few seconds before everyone else so you can get a few good shots in. Or karate chop the catcher to remove your biggest threat.

Finally, when the benches clear, do something! Don't just mill around and play grab ass with each other. This is what you're supposed to do when the benches clear:



So you know what Major League Baseball should do? Make a new rule. Any hitter that intentionally moves onto the grass in front of home plate should be automatically ejected. It should be mandatory, like arguing balls and strikes. Even if they're not charging the mound, when they just step in front like Molina did, they cause both benches to clear. It causes nothing but trouble, and BORING trouble at that.

-The Commodore