Dumbass

"Jonathan G. Parker, 19, of Fort Loudoun, Pa., was arraigned Tuesday one count of felony daytime burglary. According to court records, Deputy P.D. Ware of the Berkeley County Sheriff's Department responded on Aug. 28 to the victim's home after she reported the burglary.

"She told police that someone had broken into her home through a bedroom window. There were open cabinets in her garage, and other signs of a burglar. The victim later noticed that the intruder also used her computer to check his Facebook status, and his account was still open when she checked the computer. The victim later noticed that she was missing two diamond rings from her dresser in the same room as her computer. The two rings were worth more than $3,500, reports indicate."
-(Martinsburg Journal)

How dumb can you get? It's dumb enough to spread fingerprints all over a computer, leave a few sites in the browser's history, but who the hell robs a house, finds a pair of nice diamonds worth $3,500, then decides to check Facebook?

Did he write on his girlfriend's wall? "Tammy, we're celebrating tonight, so get a 12 pack of PBR and lube up your cooter."

Why not tag pictures of yourself robbing the house? You could be known as the Facebook bandit.

And of course, this story comes from the South. West Virginia, specifically.

-The Commodore