With the nation's wild horse population swelling to more than 33,000 and another 30,000 currently held in holding facilities it has been determined that some of these beasts must die. This is great news because, man, do I hate horses. Loathsome, useless creatures that stopped being relevant right around the James Garfield administration.I guess some expert decided the US could manage no more than 27,000 of the things at any given time so by my math we have a solid 6,000 to poach. If it were up to me, I'd release the 30,000 from horse prison and then we could really have a field day.
Can you think of anything more fun than coming up with exotic ways to assassinate a horse? Two great movies come to mind, The Patriot and 300. The horses in those flicks got fucked the fuck up and it was, in a word, awesome.
So I guess the question is, where do we go from here? Do I need to fill out any paper work or apply for a permit? Can we just head out west and start shooting? Please, someone enlighten me.
(h/t - WSJ and LA Times)
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