I figure this dog explains how I feel.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Celtics vs Hawks Preview
Well, let's just say it. The Hawks own us.
If the Celtics are like the old guy at the gym who plays fundamentally sound and never makes a mistake, then the Hawks would be the lengthy, athletic seventeen year old track star kid who who doesn't necessarily have great basketball skills but due to raw athleticism somehow dominates the game.
Bottom line, the Hawks are a team the Celtics do not match up well with.
Although I'll be the first to admit I never thought the Hawks would ever be a serious threat, I shouldn't be surprised. A couple years ago the Hawks pushed the Celtics to a game seven as the eighth seed and now what has happened since is the Celtics are older while the Hawks are hitting their primes as athletes. They're core foundation of Bibby, Crawford, Williams, Smith and old friend Joe Johnson have jelled nicely and as a Celtics fan, I would much rather see a Cavaliers or Magic then the Atlanta Hawks.
For the Celtics, this game may or may not have come at a good time. Last night's game against the Magic the Celtics dominated but at the end their offense seemed a little stagnate and with JJ Reddick actually doing something productive the Magic pulled off the W. NBA teams in general are little sluggish on the heels of back to back games, but with last nights loss and knowing the Hawks have owned them thus far, hopefully the Celtics come out thinking they got something to prove.
However, with that said, I like the Hawks in this game. I see Joe Johnson doing work on offense and Josh Smith adding a few signature breakaway dunks.
The Celtics are 4-6 in their last ten games and overall have not played ideal since their terrific start. Not a big deal, but something to think about.
-The Diesel
Bruins @ Sabres Preview
I would like to be positive, but right now it is hard to be. The Bruins are 2-7-1 in their last 10 games. Tim Thomas has lost 4 straight starts, and the Bruins can't buy a goal. To make matter worse Buffalo is 8-0-3 in its last 11 games at HSBC (their home rink) with Miller winning his last 4 starts there.
The Bruins hope the return of Marc Savard will turn around their offense. He is a playmaker that will be on a line with Satan and Lucic. The hope is that Lucic can be aggressive enough to open up some room for Savard. I have said in the past I don't like that line, because I don't view Lucic as a #1 line kind of guy.
With all the trade rumors it will be interesting to see if the Bruins will be affected, but then again they can't play much worse then they have been anyways. I wish I could predict them to win tonight, but all the stats are against them.
Game starts at 7:30 PM on NESN.
Breaking News: Kurt Warner Retires
I hate Kurt Warner I really do, but I am going to give him his day. He has announced his retirement, and I really think that is a great idea, because he has had some concussions, and if he stuck around there is no question in my mind that he would have got seriously hurt.
Now that his career is over the questions is whether or not he is a Hall of Famer. In my eyes there is no question. They guy is a first ballot Hall of Famer. He has 2 MVPs, a Super Bowl ring, and the stats to back up his career.
So, congratulations Warner you had a hell of a career, but you're still a fag.
The World's Strongest Beers
Here are the 4 strongest beers in the world according to FoxNews.com...
Dogfish Head Brewery Olde School: A barley wine style ale, which has only a mild hops bitterness with fruit dominating the flavors, this 15 percent ABV ale is an excellent introduction to the breed. A pale glowing orange in color, it's rich and heavy with just a touch of bitterness and huge berry flavors. So much so that it's better drank from a snifter than a bottle. It's the root beer of beers, with sugar and fruits wafting out of the glass, and a strange medicinal aftertaste that makes it an acquired taste for many.
Avery Mephistopheles Stout: As black-hearted as its namesake, this 15.1 percent ABV stout pours a deep coal-black and offers a creamy mocha head which disappears quickly due to weak carbonation. The tastiest beer in this lineup, a chewy mouthful reeks of toffee, molasses, and a tinge of vanilla ringed with burnt coffee and the sweet heat of the alcohol. Like most stouts, it's a meal in a glass.
Mikkeler Black: The brewery recommends aging this huge stout for a few years to take the edge off, and it's not a bad idea. Weighing in at 17.5 percent ABV, there's virtually no carbonation to lighten the creamy texture brought on by the champagne yeast used in the brewing process. Charred malt, chocolate and coffee dominate every sip, but there's nuance here too – the toffee and cherry flavors surprisingly not burned away by the high alcohol content. It’s perfect for sipping a pint slowly over the course of a very long night, but don't blame anyone but yourself for what gets posted on Facebook if any more than that is consumed.
BrewDog Tactical Nuclear Penguin: Bizarrely named, this Imperial Stout from Scotland was, for a short time in 2009, the strongest beer ever brewed, and was only recently dethroned by Schorschbrau, a German brewery that has unleashed a 40 percent ABV beer on the world. But at 32 percent ABV, Tactical Nuclear Penguin is one heck of an accomplishment. The brewery claims it's a beer for the dedicated, and they're so very right. A deep chocolate brown in the whiskey tumbler that should be its home, the light carbonation doesn't hide the smoke, tobacco, nutty malt and cola flavors that rule this beer. The heat of the alcohol masks a bit of toffee and chocolate as well. But make no mistake, the thick, almost viscous liquid is brutal in its approach. This nuke takes no prisoners and should be enjoyed sparingly. It's still technically beer, but in the same way that Heidi Montag is still technically a human.
I just had the Sam Adams Utopia beer not to long ago, and let me tell you that shit till fuck you up. Only problem is it costs like $300 a bottle, and is really hard to get your hands on.
The Answer's Rant On The Celtics
Sometimes you have to criticize the ones you love in hopes that they get better. So allow me to rip my Celtics to shreds just for the sake of venting because no one from the organization will read this. But they should.
But let me start with a quick and cool story about the Big Baby "Suck my dick" situation. So he told a fan to suck his dick. Okay. Dumb move. I thought the previous article written about this issue was spot on. Shut the fuck up Big Baby and play. Your not as good as last year. But I thought this was cool so I'm going to share it with you before I rip the whole team apart.
My girl friend is a Celtics fan. Naturally because I am. I think one of the hottest things I've ever seen is watching her parade around the house in her Perkins tee-shirt on Sunday morning and make breakfast. For some odd reason her favorite players are Perkins and Big Baby. So I say to her last night, Did you here what Big Baby did?" She replies with concern, "No, what happened?" I say "He told a fan to suck his dick" My sweet and innocent girl friend scrunches up her nose and says, "Why did he do that? What made him say that?" I said, "That fan called him fat boy so Big Baby told him to suck his dick. He's an idiot because he got suspended for a game." She freaks out. "What? Suspended? For telling a fan to suck his dick? That's fucking stupid. The fan called him fat. I would have told him to suck my fat dick. I love Big Baby. He can do no wrong." The point of this story is to show you how if my girl friend was in that situation she would have said "suck my fat dick." Yes, my broad is classy.
Now for the Celtics.
This team as it stands can't win a championship, and I'm afraid the future looks very grim in the years to come. Unless a change is made.
Lets start with Doc Rivers.
Doc. My question to you is this...do you know what the biggest snub of this year's all star game is?
No. Apparently you don't because in the final minute of the Magic game he was sitting on your bench.
Yup. That's right. Kendrick Perkins. Why is the NBA's most improved player, best defense against Dwight Howard, and highest shooting percentage in the league sitting on the bench. Oh I get it. So Rasheed can air ball the game winner. Good one. This is something I never want to see happen again. We brought Rasheed here to provide a spark off the bench. And give us length off the bench. WE ARE ABUSING HIS ROLE. I agree if that were a play off game he should be out there, but last night, that was a mistake. Perkins has been one of the most consistent players on your team, and he's on the bench in the final minute of a big game.
Rasheed. Post up more. I love that you can shoot threes. But the threat is more important than the shot itself. Make them honor your shot, don't make it your first option.
Paul. I am used to seeing Paul call for an ISO in the closing minutes of a close game. You did bang that 3. Good shot. But there were a few possessions where I thought you were a little gun shy. Please don't be. I'd rather lose on the counts of a Paul Pierce miss than a Rasheed Wallace air ball. Paul, we live and die by your final minutes in games. We won a championship that way. Please can we start doing that again.
KG. It pains me to write this. Your still in the top 5 power forwards in the league. But not what you used to be. Maybe I'm being hard on you because your not back in shape because of an injury, but still, I didn't notice the fire last night. The KG I know would single handily protect a 15 point lead. And Rashard Lewis would have ended up on his back shoot flagrant foul shots before KG lets him walk down the baseline for an easy game winning lay up. Make him earn it at the line after you throw him to the ground. KG, I blame you for that game winning shot. Yes. where was the help defense. I'm not sure but I don't care. That was on you.
Ray Ray. I really have nothing bad to say about you.
Rajon. I love you the most so your going to get the most heat from me. I'm sick and tired of watching you brick jump shots, and free throws. It pains me. Why? Because it's not like your just a good point guard. You are maybe the best point guard in the NBA. But you can't be trusted with the ball in your hands at the end of a close game. You can't shoot free throws. I'm trying to figure out how these skills in life have passed you by. The scary thing about you is, you can't shoot worth a damn, and I still think your the best. Imagine if you could shoot. You need to learn. All the great point guards could and can. You wanna be Tony Parker? Sure he's good. But he's not Steve Nash. You are the fastest player in the NBA. Best passer. Best defender (until lately) and you have a large Basketball IQ. LEARN HOW TO FUCKING SHOOT. YOU ARE OUR FUTURE. YOU HAVE RAY ALLEN ON YOUR TEAM. ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED? THE BEST SHOOTER OF ALL TIME HAS A LOCKER NEXT TO YOURS, YET YOU STILL CAN'T SHOOT. This boggles my mind. Please learn.
I'm very afraid of the future. I think the C's could squeeze out a ring this year. They need to get back to 2008 defense though. But after this year if we don't pick up someone young in the off season then I'm afraid we will be the Spurs. Ray Allen should be coming off the bench next season. He would, and he should. Lets get younger. I want to see a young shooting guard on this team next year. That's what we need. Because Paul, KG, and Ray, how many years you think they have left? How many more productive years do you think they have left? How many more injury free years o you think they have left? We need to think about the future this off season. We have a young super star point guard on our team locked up forever. Lets build for the future as well as the present.
Big Bruins Trade Coming
The Bruins are involved in a seemingly endless amount of trade rumors these days. It really should come as no surprise, as they were supposed to be a top team in the Eastern Conference, but right now they wouldn't even make the playoffs. Here is a quick run down on the rumors I am hearing.
Ilya Kovalchuk - One of the best offensive players in the NHL. It would take a lot of get him, and the Thrashers are not letting any team talk to him, which makes it difficult, since any trade could just be a rental for the rest of the season. The Thrasher are looking for at least a draft pick, a young player, and an NHL ready player. Rumor right now is that it will involve Wheeler, a guy from the minors, and one of the Bruins picks they got from the Maple Leafs in the Kessel deal, though it is being said they are not willing to trade their top pick.
Ray Whitney - He probably won't be dealt till Ilya Kovalchuk is, whoever loses out on him will most likely look to Whitney next. Other teams that are rumored are the Penguins, Flames,Canucks, Kings, and Blue Jackets.
Dion Phaneuf - I don't think this will happen, because the cost is rumored to be too high (Blake Wheeler, Dennis Wideman, a prospect and multiple draft picks).
Sheldon Souray - The Oilers are going to trade him, but he does have a no trade clause, so it would be interesting to see if the Bruins are on him list of team he would like to go to.
Paul Kariya - Certainly would give the Bruins more speed, but the question is if he would be a fit, since he is really not "power forward".
Some other guys that have been rumored are Raffi Torres, Lubomir Visnovsky, and Alexei Ponikarovsky (all guys who are on the trading block).
ESPN is saying that the only guys who are not on the trading block for the Bruins are Tuukka Rask, and their high draft pick from the Kessel trade.
Marquis Daniels Injury Update
The Celtics had initially set a target date for just after All-Star Weekend for Marquis Daniels to return to games, but now there is some hope that he will be back earlier. Here is what Doc Rivers had to say...
"He's getting close, so that's a good sign," head coach Doc Rivers told the Boston Herald. "If we can get the New Orleans game in, that would be terrific. That would give him a game before All-Star break to try to get his legs and get some type of rhythm, then come out of All-Star break and we've got our whole team intact for the first time this year (ESPN)."
I really feels like he hasn't played in forever. Right now the Celtics are kind of a mess. They can't seem to play a full game, and are just collapsing in the 2nd half. Whether it be age, rust, or bad coaching, something needs to give this team a spark. Hopefully Daniels coming back, and have the full Celtics team for the first time all year will be exactly what they need.
Rey Maualuga Continues The Bengals Tradition
Rey Maualuga pulled the classic Bengal move, he has just been arrested on charges of drunken and careless driving. Apparently Maualuga hit a parking meter and two parked cars early Friday. I am actually a big Maualuga fan, but what the fuck is it with Bengals and getting in trouble? I somewhat understand, because there is just nothing to do in Cincy (trust me I have been there 3 times, it sucks), but still this team really needs to get it together. You would have thought the whole Chris Henry thing would have woken this team up, but I guess not.
You would think that the league will suspend him a game or two for this. Who would've thought that Chad Ochocinco would be one of the "good" guys on the Bengals?
Pierce and Rondo Going To Dallas
Paul Pierce and Rajon Rondo are going to be going to the All Star game as Eastern reserves along with Chris Bosh, Joe Johnson, Gerald Wallace, Derrick Rose and Al Horford.
Not only should Rondo be an all star he should be starting for the East instead of AI. I'm not going to get on the whole fan voting thing, but it is an injustice for the best pg in the league.
The western squad looks like this:
- Steve Nash
- Kobe Bryant
- Carmelo Anthony
- Tim Duncan
- Amare Stoudemire
- Kevin Durant
- Chris Paul
- Dirk Nowitzki
- Brandon Roy
- Zach Randolph
- Deron Williams
- Pau Gasol
96 Magic, 94 Celtics
The Celtics fucking blew this one. At one point of this game the Magic were down 15 points and it looked as if it were going to be a blowout, then Rashard Lewis started hitting shots and the Celtics didn't. Then on the last play, the Celtics put KG on Rashard and Rashard beat him on a baseline dribble penetration move and Rasheed was late getting over to help and Lewis hit an easy lay up and that was the game. This was a pitiful, pathetic, and downright ugly game. Thinking about it makes me want to puke. They all sucked. Rasheed sucked, KG sucked, Pierce sucked, Perk sucked, Rondo sucked, an the bench sucked. The only one who was doing anything was Ray Allen who had 20 points and he sucked in the second half.
On a road trip this stretch of games they embarked on last night, this was the last thing they needed. They can't pull this shit against Atlanta or LA or there will be long nights. Hopefully Doc Rivers started throwing things around Pete Bell Style:
The Single Funniest Poop Story Ever
Deadspin had a great post, which was just crazy poop stories. It is a great idea, because everyone has one. Anyways, I couldn't help but put this one up...
"My kid was about 1 or 1 1/2 when he started going through a poop phase. He was obsessed with poop. He would insist on looking at a shitty diaper after he destroyed it, with a "yeah that's right, say my name, bitch!" look on his face. He would talk about it all the time in public ("Daddy I have a HUGE LOAD in my pants"). He would barge into the bathroom when I was dropping anchor and insist on taking a look at my craftwork. He even went through a period where he would stick his finger in his ass and then put it in his mouth and say "it's yummy" (by the way this was super fucked up and scarred me for life).
So one day, just after breakfast, he drops a load and my wife goes to change him. She lays him back on the changing table, takes his shitty diaper off, wraps it up, and turns to put it in the diaper genie. She looks away and then turns back, leaning over him to coo or sing or make goo goo noises or whatever chicks do. What she did not realize was that the little fecophile had stuck his hand down into his ass while she was looking away and now had what could best be described as a shit mitten. So she is singing away and he reaches up and fish hooks her with the shit mitten. Just jams his hand in her mouth and yanks down on her jaw, scraping poo off his hand with her teeth (ever eat an artichoke?). It took a second or two for her to realize he had shit all over his hands...and that she, therefore, now had a mouthful of baby shit. She gagged and was so disgusted that she promptly VOMITED ON THE BABY and started crying hysterically, which of course made the baby start crying. I heard the commotion and by the time I walked in, they were both screaming and crying, covered in regurgitated Special K and poo. My wife ran over to the bathroom and I actually saw her SPIT POO in the sink (definitely NOT a turn on). Meanwhile, the baby quickly went from crying to laughing, looks up at me innocently and says "Daddy, I'm POOOPY!" Roger that."
When I read that I literally was laughing so hard my entire floor that I worked on stopped. Worth it.
Anyways, if you want to read more of these stories CLICK HERE
Oh and feel free to share your own in the comment section.
Chick Of The Day
Today's chick is Ally Rivera. I think I could get past the fact she's wearing a Florida Gators jersey.
For more Ally Click Here
For more Ally Click Here
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Celtics @ Magic Preview
Last time these two teams played the Celtics dominated them on Christmas with a 86-77 victory. Tonight things could be a little different. Boston had been very sluggish, while KG was on the sideline. They are playing a lot better defense, and their energy seems to improving too, since they got their star forward back.
I think the key for the Celtics is to get Ray Allen going. He has been awful lately, and some wonder if he is getting to old. Well yes he is, but he is still a shooter and this cold streak will end, so I am not really too concerned about that.
What I am concerned about is Dwight Howard. The Celtics embarrassed him last time they played holding him to a season-low five points and was 1 of 7 from the field. He could come back with a vengeance tonight. Maybe not scoring, but the Celtics have had some games where they can't seem to rebound the ball. If Dwight is fired up, he could take advantage.
Boston will win this game, because the Magic are a poor shooting team, and Carter is hurting right now (shooting 31.1 percent), plus Orlando is only 5-8 over their last 13 games shooting 44% from the field.
Boston 91 Magic 86
Tommy Award: Ray Allen
Game starts at 8pm
Savard Ready To Go For Tomorrow
Savard, who was knocked out of the last 8 games because of a partial MCL tear in his right knee, will return to Boston's lineup tomorrow. It couldn't come soon enough, as the Bruins have lost 5 in a row, and are currently on the outside looking in on the NHL playoffs. The Bruins hope that he can give them an offensive spark, which they have been missing for most of the season.
Another reason this is important is because the Bruins have been linked to a number of trade rumors around the league. One inside source even said that he expects a Bruins trade within the next 2 weeks. With Savard back on the ice the Bruins can focus on what they may need to get back to where they were last year, so how he plays, and how this team gels could become very important.
Steven Jackson Punches Pregnant Women
Just another classy guy from the NFL. Steven Jackson has been accused of beating his pregnant wife, oh and to make it even better she is 9 months pregnant....Nice job buddy.
What a fucking prick. Anyways, the kid was born and seems to be fine, but you know the NFL is going to have to come down hard on this. It is totally unacceptable to ever hit a women, then you add on that she is 9 months pregnant and you just have to think Jackson has no conscience whatsoever.
Tebow To The Patriots?
My stomach hurts just typing this, but there are rumors all over the internet today saying that the perfect landing spot for Tebow is with the Patriots. Any scouts list him as a project QB, and being behind a guy like Brady would be the perfect fit for him. Still, I don't believe this for a second.
The Patriots have had success with pocket passers in their recent history (Bledsoe, Brady, Cassel), why would they want to switch? And to a guy who really has no understanding of how to read coverage, or throw timing routes. Beyong that, wouldn't this bring an unnecessary distraction to the team. Not from Tebow himself, but the media will be all over him, and a lot of stupid fans would want him in the game if Brady isn't throwing 50 TDs a year.
In the end, I don't see the Patriots wasting 1 of their 3 draft picks in the 3rd round on a QB. They just have too many other holes to fill.
Wizards Are Stuck With Gilbert Arenas
Many people (myself included) would like to see the Wizards void the contract of Gilbert Arenas, but seems highly unlikely, as Gilbert already has his legal team making sure that can't happen.
So what are their alternatives?
Well they could keep him, but I couldn't see why they would not to. The problem is they aren't left with much of a choice. Their other option is a buyout, but with a contract of $80 million it is going to be very hard to get Arenas to agree to a penny well, and according to ESPN either way they are going to be hit with his contract against the salary cap until 2014.
This really blows, and I wish there was better news for the Wizards, but it looks like they are stuck with this shithead for a long time, because there is no way anyone will trade for him.
Sox Looking To Japan Again
Boston has shown over the past couple of years that they are very interested in grabbing players from Japan to fill out their roster. Well, it looks like they are up to it again, as there are reports that the Sox are one of the teams very interested in pitcher Hisanori Takahashi. Why might the Sox be interested? For one thing he is a lefty, and those are hard to get. He is a starter, but has stated that he has no problem pitching out of the bullpen.
Here is what you need to know about him. Takahashi is a lefty whose best pitch is the screwball. He posted a 10-6 record with a 2.94 ERA last year for the Yomiuri Giants, and his best year was in 2007 when he went 14-4 with a 2.75 ERA in 186 innings.
The other teams that are reported to be interested are the Orioles, Dodgers, Mets, and Giants. I say why not? You can never have too much pitching, though he age concerns me (34).
Red Sox Tickets Go On Sale Jan 30th
Baseball season is right around the corner, and today the Red Sox announced that they will start selling tickets for most games on January 30th at 10am. To purchase tickets on Saturday morning, fans can log on to redsox.com. Fans who do not have Internet access or who require ADA accessible seating may also call 1-877-REDSOX9 for tickets. Hearing-impaired fans can call the Red Sox TTY line at 617-226-6644.
Can't wait for baseball!
New Orleans Is Kind Of Awesome
"This matter is presently set for a jury trial on Monday, February 1, 2010.
"Considering the historic victory of the New Orleans Saints, the Court finds that the trial will not be able to proceed as originally scheduled. The Court takes judicial notice that Saintsmania permeates the city of New Orleans.
"Many prospective jurors for the Parish of Orleans, several attorneys involved in this litigation and Court personnel plan on traveling to the promised land -- the Super Bowl in Miami, Florida. The Court recognizes that this pilgrimage enhances the chances of the Who Dat Nation to acquire the long sought after Holy Grail -- the Vince Lombardi trophy."
So basically the City of New Orleans is already shutting down until the Superbowl is over.
Pretty awesome stuff.
Patriots Are About To Have A Massive Problem
"a slap in the face." He then added, "I want a long-term deal or I want to be free. Point blank." Said Vince Wilfork. Which essentially means, If those faggots franchise me, I'm going to throw a fucking hissy fit and hold out. I mean as an avid Patriots hater, I kind of want this to be a huge distraction for the team and Vince Wilfork whoops Belichoke. However, I'm not really sure why players in the NFL hate getting franchised, I know it is zero job security, but you are making a ton of money for one year.
If I were the Patriots, I would probably call his bluff and draft a guy like Terrence Cody in the 2nd, or 3rd and groom him to be Vince's replacement, and hope he can take over next year.
Kind Of Funny Rondo Story
Apparently Rajon hates endorsement opportunities and is very, very,selective when it comes to opportunities to be endorsed. His agen't says, "He's not interested in that, though," agent Bill Duffy tells The Boston Globe. "He is basketball first. And a lot of stuff we present to him, he's not interested in." He apparently has turned down deals, but stays strong with Dunkin Donuts and Red Bull. He also has said when it comes to marketing terms that he is only prepared to endorse a product if he uses it a lot.
I'm sure that will change a lot as he gets older and more pub. Like this year's all star game.
The New Starting Left Fielder For The Yankees: Randy Winn
I guess Mike Cameron, Adrian Beltre and John Lackey don't sound so bad after all. Randy Winn sucks and the Yanks just signed him for around 2 million to play left instead of resigning Johnny Damon. Randy had a .262/.218/.351 last year, and even though the Yankee lineup has some protection around him, I don't think that will make a lick of difference. I have no faith he will be able to regain composure. This isn't the first questionable move the Yankees have made this offseason. First they trade for Curtis Granderson who can't hit lefties (even though he is a huge improvement over Melky Cabrera), than trade for Javier Vazquez who they have already signed before and failed miserably, and now signed washed up Randy Winn. I love that the fact the Yanks, are just making moves to make moves.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Breaking News: Arenas Suspended For Season (UPDATED)
The meeting has ended between NBA Commissioner David Stern and Gilbert Arenas. Reports say that Arenas requested to be suspended for the rest of the season. Do I buy it? No, but it is at least a nice attempt to put an end to this whole mess.
I said right when this all started that Arenas should be at least suspended for the rest of the season, so in that regard I am happy. All I want to see now is the Wizards be able to void his contract. He doesn't deserve that money, and should have to start from scratch after his suspension is over.
I doubt it will happen, but that's what I would like to see.
***UPDATED***
Javaris Crittenton has also been suspended for the rest of the season.
Hey Greg Oden Put That Dick Away
Well apparently Greg Oden went all Chris Cooley on us and now there are pictures of Oden naked floating around the internet. So, today he had to come out and apologize to the Portland organization, the NBA, and fans. When asked why he took a picture of his dick, he said "well that's the only part of me that isn't broken".
Listen professional athletes, you are celebrities (even if you never play) and you can't go around sending dick pics from your cell phone. They will get out, and you'll feel silly.
If you would like to see these pics ask DP, because he is the only one I know who would want (and has) seen these...
Wakefield/Red Sox Fued Brewing?
Going into the upcoming season most fans (and writers) think the Red Sox will have a starting rotation of Beckett, Lackey, Lester, Dice-K and Buchholz. Yet Wakefield still thinks he will be in the rotation...
“I did make the All-Star team last year. It seems every year, and I don’t know why, my name gets brought up like this when I don’t feel I need to prove myself every day. I don’t know where the rumors are coming from, but I try not to pay attention. I know my role and I know what my approach is going to be when I get to spring training: be a starter and help us win the World Series (Boston.com).”
There are a lot of Boston fans going crazy over this saying there is going to be a problem down the road. I don't see this at all. The Red Sox are known for having their starters hit the DL at some point in the season. It is a smart move to get them rest at some point, so they aren't worn out for the playoffs. I can tell you right now Beckett, and Lackey will hit the DL at some point, so Wakefield is going to get some starts. He is also there in case Buchholz and Dice-K don't pitch well (I think they will).
Anyways, just remember it is always a good thing to have "too much starting pitching". Above that Wakefield is way too old to be pitching 200 innings, so time off for him will be good as well.
The Plan for Hockey
Hockey is in trouble. Revenues down, moreso than the other sports. There are few star players despite the abundance of talent, and there's a Cold War on the horizon, with Russia's KHL. These are problems that take more drastic measures than simply introducing a salary cap, and getting rid of the redline. Here's my 5 Point Plan:
I: WIDEN THE ICE BY 10 TO 15 FEET
Players are bigger than they were when the size of a hockey rink was standardized. the 200' by 85' dimensions came from the Victoria Skating Rink in Montreal, where the first indoor game was played in 1875. Eighteen seventyfuckingfive! Do you know how small people and players were back then? Have you ever sat in a cramped seat at Fenway? Imagine seats built for people 35 years smaller!!! Widening the ice to a European size would open up play, and allow the game to flow better, particularly in the easily choked neutral zone.
II: SEVERE CONTRACTION
Why are there so few star players? Because we rarely get to see the same players more than two or three times a year. There are other benefits to contraction: the talent pool can be more concentrated, so remaining teams get better and deeper. Struggling teams like Phoenix, who bring down the average revenue of the League thus lowering the cap, can be eliminated. Hockey might work in Phoenix someday, but today isn't the day for experimenting. Smallmarket teams can also be eliminated, raising the salary cap ceiling. Candidates for contraction:
Phoenix Coyotes
LA Kings/Amnaheim Ducks (1 team in SoCal is enough)
Ottawa Senators
Buffalo Sabres
Nashville Predators
Florida Panthers
New York Islanders (2 NY area teams are enough)
Atlanta Thrashers
So a 22 or 24 team NHL, split into two conferences, or even split into 6 divisions of 4 teams, or 4 divisions of 6 teams. Weight the schedules heavily within the division so that rivalries are allowed to build. But this way, Bruins fans get to see the Red Wings more than once a season. And if we dump the East/West Conferences, and simply have 12-16 playoff teams from the entire league, there'll be more variety in playoff series. So teams like the Bruins might meet the Red Wings somewhere besides the Stanley Cup Finals.
III: LAY THE FOUNDATION FOR INTERNATIONALIZATION
The KHL will have to be reckoned with. So get ready for it now. For those who don't know, the KHL is Russia's SuperLeague, that also has teams in countries like Ukraine, Latvia, and Belarus. But by 2011 it wants to expand across Europe, absorbing the top teams from Germany, Czech Republic, Sweden, and Finland.
The NHL has to prevent the KHL from turning into a competitor instead of a minor league. The NHL should form its own minor league in Europe, and use it as a feeder for the NHL, and also a place for veterans to play. Either that, or someday merge with the KHL, and have the Stanley Cup awarded to the winner of a playoff series between European and North American champions.
Hockey is popular in major European markets, unlike baseball or football. This needs to be taken full advantage of, and not just by having a pair of games in London or Prague.
IV: COMPLICATE THE SALARY CAP
One drawback of a salary cap is that teams struggle to have "regular" players. Sure, the stars like Crosby or Ovechkin might remain with a team for most of their career. But the middleclass players turn into nomads with a cap. There needs to be exemptions and allowances for teams to hold onto homegrown players. Using the Bruins as an example, guys like Patrice Bergeron should be allowed to get paid without hitting the cap too hard. That way fans are much more familiar with their teams, and don't have to constantly learn how to pronounce new French Canadian and Russian names as players come and go through a revolving door.
V: WIDEN THE NET
This is controversial. Because as NHL goalies have become larger, the goalmouth essentially gets smaller. But at the same time, NHL shooters have become more accurate. Any widening of the goal would have to be small, very small. BMack small, 2 to 3 inches. And I don't think it's necessary to the health of the game, but it wouldn't hurt.
-The Commodore
Rhody Retires
Great game by URI last night winning with a 3 by Marquis Jones with under 5 secs left to put them over Dayton. Here is that game winning shot...
Miami To Have Recruiting Problems?
Miami has always had a lot of NFL players coming through their school, but that could change, since one of the main high schools they get players from (Miami Northwestern) is none to happy about the treatment of one of their players.
Miami Northwestern coaching staff felt that DT Todd Chandler was wronged by the Hurricanes coaches. Chandler supposedly was Miami's first commitment in the class of 2010, and the 'Canes then seemingly lost interest with no explanation. Though we may never know the full story of what happened, what matters is that there are reports going around that Miami Northwestern is now pushing their players to attend different schools then the "U".
It doesn't seem like it would be a big deal to lose a connection to one school, but this is team that had 8 players from this school (including QB Jacory Harris, WR Aldarius Johnson and LB Sean Spence). Miami really needs to find a way to fix this relationship, as it seemed like they were heading in the right direction this year, and don't need something like this to set them back again.
Need Another Reason To Hate Tebow?
Well here is one...
While we are all enjoying the Super Bowl there will be an unfortunate turn of events as Tebow and his mother (Pam) will appear in a pro-life commercial that tells the story of his risky birth 22 years ago. This has got the media in a frenzy with the whole pro-life, pro-choice thing, and has really pissed me off. For one thing, I don't want to see Tebow's face ever again on my TV. I also don't think it is right for their to be political/religious commercials during the Super Bowl. This is supposed to be about sports, and all we get is this fag telling me what I should believe.
I am not going to try to preach to you about what you should believe, but all I can say is I wish I had a time machine, so I could convince Tebow's mother to abort him.
GET OFF MY FUCKING TV TEBOW!!!!!
Paul Shirley Tells It How It Is
Paul Shirley's Blog: I haven’t donated a cent to the Haitian relief effort. And I probably will not. I haven’t donated to the Haitian relief effort for the same reason that I don’t give money to homeless men on the street. Based on past experiences, I don’t think the guy with the sign that reads “Need You’re Help” is going to do anything constructive with the dollar I might give him. If I use history as my guide, I don’t think the people of Haiti will do much with my money either…
Shouldn’t much of the responsibility for the disaster lie with the victims of that disaster? After the tsunami of 2004, the citizens of the world wailed and donated and volunteered for cleanup, rarely asking the important – and, I think, obvious – question: What were all those people doing there in the first place? Just as important: If they move back to a place near the ocean that had just been destroyed by a giant wave, shouldn’t our instinct be to say, “Go ahead if you want, but you’re on your own now.”? We did the same after Hurricane Katrina. We were quick to vilify humans who were too slow to respond to the needs of victims, forgetting that the victims had built and maintained a major city below sea level in a known target zone for hurricanes.
Dear Haitians – First of all, kudos on developing the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. Your commitment to human rights, infrastructure, and birth control should be applauded. As we prepare to assist you in this difficult time, a polite request: If it’s possible, could you not re-build your island home in the image of its predecessor? Could you not resort to the creation of flimsy shanty- and shack-towns? And could some of you maybe use a condom once in a while? Sincerely, The Rest of the World.
Ummm. He just said that. I mean I'm all for stirring a ruckus, but isn't this taking it to an extreme? If you're going to go for it, you should probably involve slavery and the holocaust.
Of Course he just got fired from ESPN too.
Ray Allen Is Pretty Awesome
Have you ever known me to worry about being in the game or playing less minutes?" he asked the The Boston Globe. "Like never. I've always said I would love to see Tony Allen play more. I would love to see Marquis Daniels in there playing more minutes. It means a great deal to this team because (if they do) we do get better."It would spare me a great deal. But the one thing I can say is that I'm in great shape. I never really feel winded when I'm on the floor."
Isn't that an awesome quote? Ray Allen is pretty awesome for a teammate and this quote solidifies that he is so great. Like I said yesterday, if the opportunity knocked and there was a guy like Monta Ellis or Amare Stoudimire on the line I would jump in a second, but I really want Ray to finish his career in Boston. Ray said he would take a significant pay cut after his contract is up, and when he does the Celtics will have a lot of money. Figuring Tony Allen, Eddie House, Brian Scalabrine, Ray Allen, and I think Marquis is off the books too, the Celtics have a lot of money to play with. I think its roughly 11 mill if you take every player not named Ray Allen off the books, and then you would think Ray will get paid 5-7 million to stay here so in all we have about 20 million off the cap next year. That could definitely sign some real good player or some second tier players. The Celtics will be able to solidify they're future this offseason (maybe Rudy Gay Bob?)
BC 75, #21 Clemson 69
Okay, BC isn't a contender this year. They're NIT material at best. They might not even be in the Top 5 teams in New England (UConn and URI are both good, BC lost to Harvard and Maine). But that doesn't mean I can't enjoy a nice upset win over Clemson!
Clemson was off. No doubt about it. But BC took advantage. The Eagles went to the line 35 times, compared to just 12 trips for Clemson. Clemson's much bigger, but the teams tied in rebounds with 27.
What does BC need to do to earn an NCAA bid? Quite a bit. This victory was Step #1. Unfortunately, steps 2 thru 11 involve winning every single game left on the schedule, including home games against Duke (February 6th) and UNC (20th). Not likely.
But I enjoyed it nonetheless.
-The Commodore
Hold Up, Jesus Has Something To Say About College Basketball
The Kentucky Wildcats led by superfrosh John Wall and Eric Bledsoe have taken their rightful place as the #1 team in the land. The Longhorns took a big ol' shit on my claims of them being the best team in the nation with two straight losses. However, you have to give them props for going to Connecticut to play a big game. Other coaches could learn a thing or two about stepping up from Rick Barnes. They lost, but I don't think that loss will kill them come tourney ranking time if they finish strong, because I think UConn will finish with a good season in the Big East. Some critics of Texas have said that Barnes is playing too many guys, routinely dipping into his bench for five and sometimes six reserves. For a while I held off from this criticism as I figured early in the year it may be good to rest some of the marquis big guys like James and Pittman, but once conference season rolls aroudn you should have your lineup well situated. Barnes may have been trying to do that against UConn, but foul trouble forced his hand in playing a lot of guys off the bench. The college game just isn't long enough to warrant no player going over 30 minutes when your big name guys are as talented as Texas. Bottom line though, Pittman didn't show up in CT. He fouled out in 15 minutes and was mostly useless while he was in there. Texas should be fine, with enough big games left on the schedule to impress the selection committee. I still expect them to compete for a #1 seed in March.
UConn on the other hand seemed to finally be the team we've been waiting for, ironically enough without coach Jim Calhoun on the sideline. He's currently taking a leave due to personal illness which is not believed to be career threatening. (They said the same about Lute Olsen in Arizona.)
Hopefully, the Huskies can keep it up and run through a very tough Big East season without any let-down losses. A win at Providence on Wednesday will certainly help keep the train rolling.
Kansas, Villanova and Syracuse all still have 1 loss a piece (heading into Tuesday night), though I would put Syracuse ahead of Villanova because I think they're more versatile and their win over a good G'Town team was impressive. That being said I think G'Town is a bit high coming off that loss to 'Cuse at #7. I'd probably swap them with Purdue who continues to impress and may just be my Final Four sleeper in March if they keep it up.
All Rams fans should be rooting for Oklahoma State to keep up their winning ways, after a nice win over Kansas State who had previously knocked off #1 Texas.
Temple is #15. I haven't seen them play in person, but I have a hard time believing in an Atlantic 10 team in the Top 15. I'm an A-10 guy, but I think there are probably some teams better deserving of that spot. I'll have to try to catch them soon.
BYU also has one loss, and no doubt is sporting some 7 foot Mormons who can shoot, pass and block shots. (They're also probably 26!)
Pitt has taken a couple bad losses in recent games, including their last game at Seton Hall. (Another testament to how tough conference road games are.)
Vandy seems a bit out of place on these rankings, but 20-25 every week are starting to become a revolving door. At least we don't have Northern Iowa in here anymore and Butler is also nowhere to be seen. Back to the pumpkin carriage with you, Butler!
AP Top 25 (Rank, record, points, previous ranking).
1. Kentucky (65) 19-0, 1625, 2
* Last game: vs Arkansas, W 101-70 (1/23)
2. Kansas 19-1, 1519, 3
* Last game: vs Missouri, W 84-65 (1/25)
3. Villanova 18-1, 1503, 4
* Last game: at St. John's, W 81-71 (1/23)
4. Syracuse 20-1, 1455, 5
* Last game: vs Georgetown, W 73-56 (1/25)
5. Michigan St. 17-3, 1324, 6
* Last game: at Minnesota, W 65-64 (1/23)
6. Texas 17-2, 1307, 1
* Last game: at Connecticut, L 74-88 (1/23)
7. Georgetown 15-4, 1124, 12
* Last game: at Syracuse, L 56-73 (1/25)
8. Duke 16-3, 1120, 7
* Last game: at Clemson, W 60-47 (1/23)
9. West Virginia 15-3, 1113, 11
* Last game: vs Ohio St., W 71-65 (1/23)
10. Purdue 16-3, 977, 13
* Last game: vs Michigan, W 69-59 (1/23)
11. Kansas St. 16-3, 960, 10
* Last game: vs Oklahoma St., L 69-73 (1/23)
12. BYU 20-1, 894, 14
* Last game: at San Diego St., W 71-69 (1/23)
13. Gonzaga 16-3, 847, 15
* Last game: vs Loyola Marymount, W 85-69 (1/23)
14. Tennessee 15-3, 837, 8
* Last game: at Georgia, L 63-78 (1/23)
15. Temple 17-3, 707, 16
* Last game: at Fordham, W 62-45 (1/23)
16. Wisconsin 16-4, 635, 18
* Last game: vs Penn St., W 79-71 (1/24)
17. Pittsburgh 15-4, 599, 9
* Last game: at Seton Hall, L 61-64 (1/24)
18. Mississippi 15-4, 411, 22
* Last game: at LSU, W 73-63 (1/23)
19. Connecticut 13-6, 286, NR
* Last game: vs Texas, W 88-74 (1/23)
20. Ohio St. 14-6, 270, 21
* Last game: at West Virginia, L 65-71 (1/23)
21. Vanderbilt 15-3, 264, NR
* Last game: vs Auburn, W 82-74 (1/23)
22. Georgia Tech 14-5, 194, 19
* Last game: at Florida St., L 66-68 (1/24)
23. New Mexico 18-3, 180, NR
* Last game: vs Colorado St., W 82-64 (1/23)
24. Baylor 15-3, 157, 25
* Last game: vs Massachusetts, W 71-45 (1/23)
25. UAB 17-2, 125, NR
* Last game: at Marshall, W 61-59 (1/23)
Dropped Out: No. 17 Clemson, No. 20 Northern Iowa, No. 23 Mississippi St., No. 24 North Carolina
Others Receiving Votes: Florida St. 111, Northern Iowa 106, Clemson 103, Wake Forest 98, Butler 69,Mississippi St. 42, Texas A&M 29, Oklahoma 25, Missouri 24, Maryland 22, Cornell 16, Old Dominion 11, Xavier 11, UNLV 6, Northwestern 5, Virginia 3, Siena 3, St. Mary's 2, Louisiana Tech 2, California 2, Harvard 1, Coastal Carolina 1
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Ravens Hire Dean Pees
I tried coming up with a play on words for the headline but my brain is mush today. Something with appeasement or pissed off, there are too many possibilities for me to focus properly.
Anyway, the Ravens have hired the former Patriot D-Coordinator to be their LB Coach. Pees was the LB Coach up here until being promoted to coordinator.
I'm not surprised. Did the Patriots defense seem coordinated to anyone? Pees seems like a guy that can help out veterans, specifically at linebacker (he'll have Ray Lewis and Terrell Suggs down there), but struggled to coach younger players.
To be fair to Pees, he was handed the keys to a poorly constructed and unfurnished house. He had an inexperienced defensive backfield, a below average LB Corps, and the unit had just lost its biggest leaders (Bruschi, Harrison, Seymour).
-The Commodore
Anquan Boldin Rumors Heating Up
There have been rumors about a Boldin trade since last offseason. He has come out and stated that he will not demand a trade this offseason, but from the reports I have been reading the Cardinals are shopping him anyways.
All the teams you would suspect are being rumored (Bucs, Chiefs, Dolphins, Jags, Lions, Panthers and Ravens). All of them make sense, but now there is a rumor that the Patriots might be interested.
Last offseason the Cardinals were offered a 3rd round pick from a couple of teams for Boldin, but they turned it down. A lot of "insiders" seem to think that Arizona is now more willing to listen to offers that may be a little lower then his actual value (probably a 2nd round pick). My guessing is that these rumors are started because of how many picks the Patriots have in the upcoming draft (and the year after).
Am I for it?
Kind of, but not really. Obviously Boldin is sick, and it would make the Patriots passing attack once again ridiculous, but I am all for changing this team's identity back to the hard nose defense first kind of team. I would rather the Patriots spend the money to fix the defense (especially on players that can get the to QB), also I think it is way more important to have a strong running game to go along with Brady/Moss.
Anyways, it is just a rumor started most likely by writers. I can see the logic, but I just think there will be some team out there that would be willing to trade a first round pick for this guy.
In other news: Tom Brady will not need offseason surgery.
Lane Kiffin Already In Trouble At USC?
Well this didn't take long. Apparently there are reports surfacing that as the a high school AD for incoming recruit CB Nickell Robey said...
"[Robey's] planning to visit Southern Cal next week. Monte Kiffin has been very persistent. He's probably been in here more than is legal. Of course they don't pay attention to the rules (ESPN)."
Ok, this could be nothing, but Kiffin has had a history of not giving a fuck when it comes to the rules of recruiting. The NCAA is already all over USC, and this is not going to help anything. My prediction is that Kiffin is at USC for 3 years, fired, and then is never heard from again.
And with that I have to put this video up again...
Hilarious.
Oakland A's Sign Ben Sheets
Ben Sheets has signed with the Oakland A's today, as he has passed his physical and it is all but done. Sheets will get a 1 year deal worth right around $10 million. I love this signing by the A's, they are not locked into him long term, and all the scouts say he looks like he is healthy and ready to go. Oakland has a ton of young pitching talent, and if Ben Sheets can be a top of the rotation kind of guy they could have a great pitching staff. Still, with their current lineup I don't see them making the playoffs, but they will be a team that a lot of teams will not want to play, if this rotation works out the way I think it will.
I Will Never Understand The Raiders
I mean who does right???
Well today the Raiders signed Hue Jackson to be their offensive coordinator. A seemingly uninteresting story until you dig a little deeper. Hue Jackson interviewed for the head coaching job as well. There have been rumors going on for weeks now that Cable was on his way out. As of right now he is still the head coach, but most reports suggest that if the Raiders start out slowly next season that they will fire Cable and put Hue Jackson as the head coach.
I usually wouldn't have too much of a problem with this since my normal thinking is that every coach should get 2-3 years to show that he can build a team. Yet, with Cable there is a lot more too it. When he is not punching women in the face he is punching his assistant coaches. This guy has done everything he can to get fired, and yet here he is. Now you got your next head coach right next to him on the sidelines. Does no one else see this as a potential problem?
Cable has a long history of anger management problems, so if the team was to lose their first couple games, and the pressure mounts on Cable, don't you think this could be a dangerous situation with the next head coach stand just a couple feet away from him?
I don't know, but if I was the Raiders Cable would have to be let go.
Everyday I Lose A Little More Respect For Big Baby
I have been a Big Baby supporter since his LSU days, but this year he is just really rubbing everyone the wrong way. It started with the fist fight with his friend that resulted in a broken hand. When he finally made his way back from that he decided it would be a great idea to yell "suck my dick" at a fan, because the fan called him fat. This made Doc finally come out and say that he needed to grow up.
So how does Big Baby decide to show that he is all grown up? By changing his nickname of course...
Writing this makes me want to throw up, but "Big Baby" would like to change his name to "Uno Uno", because he wear #11...get it?
First off, that is the worst name I have ever heard. Sure when Ochocinco did it is was kind of funny because he actually changed his name to that, and it was original. This is not, this is just Big Baby being a stupid little kid. You know what would be a good idea? Shutting the fuck up and start playing like you did in the playoffs this year. He has not been nearly as effective on the boards as he was in the playoffs last year. He looks a little slow, and Doc is obviously not happy with him. So, "Big Baby" keep your name, because it fits your stupid fucking mouth...
A Tickle Me Elmo Joke
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys.
The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.
Well, Jessica is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am.
The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.
The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.
He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands Jessica surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.
She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Jessica .
‘I'm sorry,’ he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, ‘but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday...’
‘Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.’
The NCAA Basketball Rules Are Kind Of A Joke
I have to quote this:
After filling his stat line again on Saturday (16 points, seven assists, three steals), Kentucky freshman John Wall said he had "no choice" but to enter this year's NBA Draft.
That echoed UK Coach John Calipari insisting to radio host Dan Patrick earlier in the week that Wall would turn pro after this season.
"I joke about coming back, and like you say, he tells me, no," Wall said after UK's 101-70 victory over Arkansas on Saturday.
When a reporter noted that players must obey their coach, Wall smiled and said, "Yeah. I really have no choice."
Calipari told Patrick he'd wrestle with Wall rather than let the freshman return for a second UK season."
"Coach might," a smiling Wall said. "He might pull my eye out. You never know."
Kentucky.com
Both John Calipari and John Wall know the whole system is a joke. I think it's really stupid too. If I was a kid who was as good as John Wall, I would have done the Brandon Jennings technique and at least gone over seas to make some money before going to the NBA. I personally think that there should be no age limit in the NBA. The only big question with this is a person's maturity level. As a high school kid your not mature enough to live in an NBA lifestyle, but is a year in college that big of a difference?
Wall was the preseason number 1 pick in the NBA draft, and is going to be the number 1 pick now. Him going to college was just a waste of his time.
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